on my own...

And now I'm all alone again,
Nowhere to go, no one to turn to.
Did not want your money sir,
Came out here cuz I was told to.
And now the night is near,
Now I can make believe he's here.

Sometimes I walk alone at night
When everybody else is sleeping.
I think of him, and then I'm happy
With the company I'm keeping.
The city goes to bed,
And I can live inside my head.

On my own,
Pretending he's beside me.
All alone,
I walk with him till morning.
Without him,
I feel his arms around me,
And when I lose my way I close my eyes
And he has found me.

In the rain,
The pavement shines like silver.
All the lights
Are misty in the river.
In the darkness,
The trees are full of starlight,
And all I see is him and me for ever and forever.

And I know
It's only in my mind,
That I'm talking to myself
And not to him.
And although I know that he is blind,
Still I say,
There's a way for us.

I love him,
But when the night is over,
He is gone,
The river's just a river.
Without him,
The world around me changes.
The trees are bare and everywhere
The streets are full of strangers.

I love him,
But every day I'm learning,
All my life,
I've only been pretending!
Without me,
His world will go on turning,
The world is full of happiness that I have never known!

I love him...
I love him...
I love him...
But only on my own...
(Les Miserables ost)

love this song so much... it's really reflected what am I feeling now... maybe someday i will learn but not now... I know it's not now for me.. I'm not ready yet... I still want to dream that he's mine.. I care for him,but it's only on my own...

Finally FRIDAY!!!

I'm so happy today...it's Friday!!! After a tiring week I almost reach the time for relax....ahahaha
Nothing so important yesterday.. my life is so boring..maybe a lot of you will think like that... I won't be angry..because that's the reality...
I'm not a kind of girl who likes to sit, read, and listen to the music for hours... I can't do that... I'm a kind of girl who listen to the music while I walk around... I'm not a very active one, but I will be happier if there's something I can do rather than sitting around doing nothing...
Oc...I'm not that simple...I'm so complicated...OOOO... how can my life be like this??? I think I always take the easiest way to life..but I'm wrong...I always take a big fat chance to take the harder one...
I mean... why we should take the easy one if there's the hard one?? Why we always run from a problem?? Why we don't want to take a chance first, and then when we fail we can take the easy one?? Mystery of life...
I'm sorry I always confused you all with my mind... I hope I won't do it again eventhough I know I will... Why life is so complicated???
You said yes and then the reality is no...
You said no and then the reality is yes...
Human... don't know what are they thinking about in their mind...

boring..boring....

I am so tired today...since yesterday was a very full day for me... woke up at 6, went to rotary, went to school, changed my schedule, went to Walmart, went home...
And it's not done yet... I made a banana bread yesterday, eventhough it didn't look so good, but it still taste good..hahaha I think it's one of my talent too... not cooking... everyone know I can't cook... everytime I cook either it will burn or it won't taste good...hahaha
Oc, just want to talk about yesterday... It was so weird at school yesterday... I was just so hyper(usually I do like this, but never been so hyper like yeaterday...), I run everywhere, I was so active in the class (that I've never done it before...), and there's a boy asked my cellphone number too!! That's the first time a boy asking for my cellphone number here... Interesting...haha
And then I went home, in the ride home, my host sister was so crabby, made me have a hardcore headache... She talked about something not important, laughed to everything's not fun, and she sang a song in the radio soo bad... drive me crazy!!!
And when we got home, I heard that I would spent my night in the bowling alley, watched my host mom, my host sister, and my my host gramma bowl... boring...boring...
And this morning, I went to school with Haylee.. she live in Frazee, so I go to school with her everyday... she's nice, just so quiet...
O...ya... have I told you that I've just start do scrapbooking too??? I don't know what had happened with me since I live here... I've became a very different girls... weird...weird...weird...

New Schedule!!

Today I started my day just like the other Tuesday...
Wake up at 6 a.m, take shower, and having a rush to the car.. Just like another tuesday, I need to go to Rotary meeting... They never ask me to come every morning but I'm the one who want it...since they're the one who accomodate me while I have my exchange year here, I'm kind of respect them I think...hehehe
Actually, eventhough they're older people bu they're very nice and so funny sometimes..give me some reasons to smile every tuesday morning... But, the food is the best!! At least oncce a week I can get another breakfast other than cereal... Corn Pops!! The only thing that make me can continue my life...hahahha I'm kind of addicted with this cereal... Can we addicted with cereal?? Talk about addicted..I addicted to a lot of stuff... Like chocolate (any kind...), ice, milk, cereal and everything should be in choco flavor... Oh my god... I've just realize that I eat a lot of chocolate... Really want to know if I gain weight or not here... Doesn't mean I'm a "thin girl" fan, since I'm a little bit chubby... Oh...hate it when I need to say it...hahaha
I didn't go to school yesterday, it meant there's a lot homework and project waiting for me today...AAARGH... And I have my new schedule today...hope it will be COOL classes!! I'm so excited!!hehehe

My 1st blog!!!! ^o^

Finally...

after 6 months intended to make a blog, I've already did it!!!
Feel so happy...
Just want to thanks Pat for allowing me to stay at home, giving me time for browsing my best friend and his group blog,that made me realize that I haven't done anything yet since I promised my mom to make a blog 6 months ago...
Mom...I did it!!!ahahhahaha

I'm not promise it will be all good...I'm not a good girl, but I'm not a bad girl either...
I'm not that talented too in writing, since I know I won't get more than C for all of my literature class...-.-

Enjoy!!!^-^